The cast responds to a bonus question in chat form every Thursday night. I recently hooked up with a Grindr user who was acting a little strangely. He extended an invitation to his apartment complex, but in the interest of "discretion," he insisted that we meet in the building's pool showers rather than there. I assumed that meant he didn’t want the neighbors seeing him bringing random men.

We began to do our thing when I entered the locker room private stalls, no one else in sight but he became extremely paranoid at any sound, such as a door closing in the hallway, and we had to stop frequently. (It was silly, but you put up with things because he was hot. Vietnam Sex Movies

Sorry if I seemed jumpy, but I'm married and I live with my wife here, he said as we were getting dressed in the locker room after we had finished. Wife. in a residence down the hallway. Dude! I simply looked at him before leaving. I felt a little bad after, and I then remembered instances in the past where I had assumed a guy was married for a variety of reasons without actually asking.

I sometimes saw those guys more than once without asking. The man said it aloud this time, which is the only difference. What do you think my level of accountability is in this situation? I stay away from profiles that make it clear they are married and seeking discreet play. But should I feel guilty about not asking if I get the feeling but neither of us says anything? Rich: As I was reading the second sentence of this letter, I realized that the author was married. The man was married, it was discovered later.

I'm not sure if I'm clairvoyant or just slutty. Stay: How often do you encounter married men using gay dating apps? Rich: Is your wife a woman? hardly ever. It's much more typical to be married to a man and live in (what they claim are) open quarters. Okay, Stay. I wanted to know if you had more experience with this or if you were just more aware of the symptoms than I am.

When I first started reading it, I assumed it would be about him having a child or living with one or both of his parents, as well as how to find a place to stay that was more comfortable than a locker room. Rich: Well, generally speaking, "discreet" dog whistles some sort of conflict between seeking out casual gay sex and the realities of one's daily life.

It could imply that you are generally secretive, that you don't want your neighbors to find out that you are having sex with outsiders, or any of the other things you mentioned. But when people snoop around and invite someone over but not inside, my mind automatically thinks, "He's married and she doesn't know." I see, Stay.

I believe our writer can let go of the notion of "should" and pay attention to his current emotions. He’s writing because he does feel bad, and that feeling is letting him know where his boundaries are. Rich: I find that to be very wise. When someone lies or deceives you, it's not your fault. These hookups are a break from daily life, which is one of the reasons why many people enjoy them.

They are inherently removed from their context. You hope that people will provide you with enough details so that you can proceed with the anonymous sex in a way that enables you to make moral and knowledgeable decisions, but there are few established guidelines, so behavior varies greatly.

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